Running into Myself: How I Lost 85 Pounds and Came Back to Life

It was 2010.  In the midst of one of the worst recessions in US history, I was 24, jobless with a college degree, living at my step dad’s house, and deeply depressed.  Aside from spending hours each day submitting job application after job application, I sat in seclusion, stuffing my face and sitting comatose in front of the television.  Finally, after months of searching, I landed a position at a travel agency.  The job was far from ideal and the pay was subpar, but it was a job. 

A few weeks after starting the job, I started to shake off the cage of self-pity and despair that had kept me prisoner for so long.  I was keeping myself busy, engaged, earning a living, and I had even made a few friends.  Still, I looked in the mirror and felt like a failure.  I was the heaviest I had ever been.  I started to worry about my health and decided that if I wanted to live a full, happy life, I needed to do something about my weight and eating issues.

Food had long been the enemy.  Growing up, I was always thin and was obsessive about my eating habits. From college until several years into adulthood, I struggled to maintain a healthy weight and to develop a healthy relationship with food.  Then, when I had this epiphany in 2010, I slowly learned how to fuel my body, focusing less on weight loss and more on health.  A close friend of mine wanted to try vegetarianism, so I decided to join her challenge.  I also started exercising on a regular basis, starting with brisk walks – small steps.  After a few months of this new regimen, I lost about 25 pounds.  I felt better, mentally and physically.  After keeping that up for about a year, I lost a total of 65 pounds.  Then, when I began to feel too weak and tired, I decided it was time to add meat back into my diet.

I continued focusing on eating mainly fresh fruits and vegetables, beans, nuts, lean meat and fish.  I ate dairy in small quantities.  I never worried about counting calories and never starved myself; I just listened to what my body needed and made sure to get moving at least a few times per week.  The most effective – and the most challenging – part of it all: learning not to eat my feelings.  With the help of regular sessions with a professional counselor, journaling, personal research on emotional eating, and learning to seek more emotional support from family and friends, I managed to get a handle on my emotional eating and lost a total of 85 pounds. 

I have kept the weight off for over 4 years, and I am more active and healthy than ever.  Since that first day of my journey, I have developed a love of running. I have completed numerous races over the last several months, including my first half marathon.  I went from feeling lifeless, struggling to get through each day - let alone getting off the couch - to finding a true passion.  If I go a few days without a run, I feel out of sorts.  Nothing beats that runner’s high and the solace of the outdoors – just you and your thoughts, spending some quality time with Mother Nature.                          

I must emphasize that I am not an expert on health, fitness, or life in general.  Anyone close to me knows that I am a huge dork with a sense of humor who just happens to be a runner.  This story is not intended to provide professional advice, but hopefully it gives someone some motivation to take that first step.